You're yelling at me!
I was a custody and parenting time mediator for many years and worked with hundreds of families. During that time, I noticed that my tone of voice and the pace at which I spoke had a profound effect on how the mediation went. I learned to use both of these subtleties in a strategic way to help people lower their emotional reaction, listen more carefully, and feel heard and cared for more directly.
I often hear kids complain to their parents, "But you're yelling at me!". The parent replies, "I am not yelling!" and on and on it goes . . . no understanding or resolution gained.
When I saw this email in my inbox this morning, I knew I wanted to share it. I have enjoyed GoZen!'s website over the years and find it to be a place for advice that is both practical and effective.
So, here's to a new awareness in your toolbox!
Best to All,
BTW, I still offer family mediation for custody and parenting time issues and for other things. If you know someone in need of these services, I would appreciate your referral.
Here is the link to the website if you want to do further exploring . . .
and here is the printable I received in the email (credit to GoZen!)
Download PDF • 1.66MB