Good morning All,
I woke up this morning thinking about parenting (as I often do) and once again appreciated the work of Daniel Siegel and his colleagues. He is a neuroscientist who has done a lot of research and conceptualization about children's brains and how they best develop to create fully integrated, thoughtful, creative, and whole human beings. And THEN, he translated that vital scientific information into clear, easily understood principles for parenting. My favorite of his books (at the moment) is The Whole Brain Child, written with co-author Tina Payne Bryson. The book is available in paper form, kindle, or audiobook. I find the audible version most helpful. It is read by the authors and gives a nuance to the teachings that I don't get when reading on a page.
In a nutshell, the 12 strategies are:
1. Connect and Redirect: Surfing Emotional Waves
2. Name It to Tame It: Telling Stories to Calm Big Emotions
3. Engage, Don't Enrage: Appealing to the Upstairs Brain
4. Use It or Lose It: Exercising the Upstairs Brain
5. Move It or Lose It: Moving the Body to Avoid Losing the Mind
6. Use the Remote of the Mind: Replaying Memories
7. Remember to Remember: Making Recollection a Part of Your Family's Daily Life
8. Let the Clouds of Emotion Roll By: Teaching That Feelings Come and Go
9. SIFT: Paying Attention to What's Going on Inside
10. Exercise Mindsight: Getting Back to the Hub
11. Increase the Family Fun Factor: Making a Point to Enjoy Each Other
12. Connect Through Conflict: Teach Kids to Argue with a "We" in Mind
These principles are supported with loads of stories about real life family situations that help illustrate the principles and each principle arises from current research on the workings of the brain. I highly recommend this book as one way to help you think through the principles you want to hold while making the very important parenting decisions you face daily.